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📈🚨 Market Freakshow: Who Celebrates Pink Slips & Tariffs? 🎪
Markets did a keg stand Wednesday, cheering for job losses and a “big beautiful” Vietnam tariff hammer that smacks you, the consumer, right in the wallet.
✅ Nasdaq +0.7% as Big Tech flies on hopes the Fed will pivot 🤑
✅ 33,000 private payroll jobs gone — Wall Street’s thrilled
✅ Trump’s Vietnam deal means higher prices on apparel (Nike, LULU, ONON)
✅ Robinhood memes never die — $13M Jan 2026 calls on HOOD
✅ SPY dark pool prints over $2.3B — someone’s ready for the apocalypse
⚡ The Actionables:
👉 Nonfarm payrolls Thursday could break the Fed’s spirit
👉 Defensive sectors might get love if labor keeps tanking
👉 Big Tech is the only thing holding up this house of cards
💥 Are you positioned for a Fed faceplant or a melt-up? Drop your hottest take in the comments — we’ll feature the best in tomorrow’s newsletter! 👇
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